Baby Dog's a Bitch

Baby Dog pissed on the floor THREE TIMES last night.
What is her problem? We need to get her signed up for puppy classes, because she's being a bitch.
And also - she bit Beaner's dad on the face and made him bleed for like 10 minutes. She bit me a bunch of times too, and gave me a fat lip with her huge paw. She's being really bad. I feel like she's acting out because we haven't taken her for a walk in, oh... a week? Maybe more? So we are going to walk her tonight - and take her to the dog park on Sunday afternoon. But isn't that rewarding her bad behaviour?

I need to learn to think like a dog so I can figure this shit out.

PS: That's Nibbles holding the Baby Dog... she has a fancy watch. Nibbles - not Baby Dog. If I bought Baby Dog a fancy watch she'd just chew it and I'd get mad. Not that I bought Nibbles her watch, because I didn't. I need to stop now.